May 3rd, 2001
Film School
One think that I’ve decided throughout my time in Korea is that I’ve met some of the most unique people in the world over here. I think it takes a special type of mentality to leave everything you know and journey to some place that is foreign and distant. In some cases, it is an insatiable thirst for adventure that drives people abroad and in others, it is confusion and/or mental instability. There is another teacher at my school named Bob. This is an actual conversation that Bob and I had the other day:
Jiyan: You know, I decided not to go to film school.
Bob: What’s this?
Jiyan: I decided not to go to film school. First thing is, it seems to take 8-10 years to break through regardless of. . .
Bob: Jiyan baby, how long have I been telling you not to go to film school? I’ve been telling you not to go to film school for like three months now.
Jiyan: Well, it’s also just that even though they tell you that you can probably graduate in about three years, it normally takes about five. That’s five years of tuition debt, on top of eight to ten years of struggling. . .
Bob: You would be seventy by the time you graduate.
Jiyan: Exactly. I think the best thing you can get out of film school is a feature length script and a short film.
Bob: I’ve been writing a script, I haven’t got very far, only about fifteen lines. But it’s a great fifteen lines.
Jiyan: What’s your story about?
Bob: Well, it’s about this guy who is just graduated from College, a bit of a slacker. And there is Mother Nature, I have to find some gorgeous girl to play Mother Nature, I don’t know where I’ll find her. Anyway, corporate business captures Mother Nature and they put her into a closet. Basically this slacker guy has to find her. It’s a coming of age type story.
Jiyan: So, does the guy have to break into corporate business’ office to find her?
Bob: Yes, but he’s with two friends. The beauty of this scene is that you only need a room. That’s all. I have about twenty special effects in mind for this scene.
Jiyan: I see.
Bob: The real story isn’t in the plot itself, but it is revealed in the conversations between the guy and his friends. It’s a real coming of age type story, you know, dealing with finishing college and trying to figure out what to do.
Anyway, that is tame in comparison to some of the things that I’ve heard from Robbie, a former teacher at my school who I met through a present one. He has made some of the most outrageous claims I’ve ever heard, including:
“Korea will go to war with China, sometimes in the spring of 2001. I know this for a fact.”
“I have three friends who work for the US government and they are undercover in Seoul. Each of them has at least 300 kills under his belt.”
“Every year, the US government kidnaps tens of thousands of children and turns them into killing machines. They teach them how to disassociate themselves from their psyche so that they can concentrate enough to hit a moving target in a crowd at 100 yards.”
“Each president of the United States has been a free mason. In order to achieve the presidency, they must have fought and defeated a lion with their bare hands at some point in their life.”
These are just a few amongst the host of fascinating things to have come out of Robbie’s mouth. The bizarre thing is that he says these with 100% conviction and will actually get quite belligerent when people try to call him out on the validity behind them.
This is my life in Korea.
